therealwil.com

  
The Invitation
I walk into the classroom and the first thing I notice is that the chairs have been strategically positioned in a tight small circle. I am not feeling this already. One by one strange people file into the room and none of them look like me. By a quick assement of who is here, I confidently conclude that I must be in the wrong room. I know you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, but this is looking like a closet freak fest that I was mistakenly invited to.  By the name tags, Paul looks like he sniffs the vegetables at the local farm stand, Eric surely looks like he has something to do with earthworm collecting. The problem is I have an invitation and I’m getting really concerned. You want me to sit in a circle with moist palms McCloud and a dude who clearly looks like he has everything to do with all of the stolen undergarments and socks from laundry rooms all over the Earth.  

In walks Bob the facilitator. Good afternoon gentlemen, my name is Bob and for the next hour I will be leading the discussion. We have a new client with us today, Mr. Wilford. While Bob is talking, I am talking to myself, “I don’t believe this crap. I am having close encounters with the nutty bus boys.”

So Rich, tell us a little about yourself?” I really wanna say, my name is Montel and I played bongos with Confunction back in the day but somehow I think this will extend my stay a tad bit longer than I desire to be here. I did however want to change my zodiac sign to throw them off a little bit. I found out there is something about lying about your sign that people really don’t appreciate. 

 Before I start talking, I purposely made my left eye twitch seemly uncontrollably just to establish that I also didn’t have it all. Ok here goes, My name Rich and I am (I hesitated), CRAZY if I tell you people reading this blog. Why would I tell the Beastie boys what is wrong with me, and you have not showed up yet. I mean really? There is an empty chair in this circle and it has your name on it. Maybe I will me mention to Bob that you are on the way!! Don’t worry, I’ll hold off the meeting until you get here. I’ll keep them occupied with my story about the time I..well never mind. Hurry up and get here!!