Things are beginning to change. It’s nothing new because change seems to be a part of the norm now. As I am getting settled, I see my routine changing. There are new things on the list that require my full attention and doing so draws me away from what I have busied myself with prior.
More time required for duty automatically means less time for leisure. The mental space required to download new critical information as a priority, bumps out anything that has taken residence in said places.
When discipline and order lead the day, useless and wasteful conversations seem to dwindle away. Many times we struggle with ridding ourselves of unproductive systems and habits that destroy us. If we simply put the right things in place, the ruinous habits will dissipate because you can’t be in two places at the same time. By choosing one as the winner, the other is by virtue the loser. There cannot be two winners.
Now I find myself with the task of terminating my bad babysitter. Why would anyone employ a bad babysitter in the first place you ask? I admit, it was only to keep me company. Sometimes bad company feels better than no company at all.
As most single adults, I spend large amounts of time by myself. To fill the void and absence loved ones in our space, we choose social media to tend to our emptiness, or at least I have. Being in a new place, in a new time zone, in what feels like total obscurity at times, I hired social media to carry out the task of keeping me company. What a bad babysitter!!
Bad because you are kept company but not cared for. You are enlightened but not
educated. You are kept busy and quiet but not necessarily strengthened and empowered. It’s just a person left in the room next door with the task of supposedly watching over and protecting you. What a farce but I knew it. It’s a babysitter but not a good one. It’s company but not good company. It keeps you preoccupied with stuff.
No one is at fault or to blame but me. I chose the babysitter. I did no background check or research on the babysitter, nor did I check for references. I just chose the babysitter who would allow me to get away what ever I had the desire to do. I just wanted someone to be there and I still don’t know if someone was ever there.
As the world turns and my attention is required in other places, I am finding less time and need for the babysitter. Growing up dismisses the need. We are capable of keeping ourselves company and entertained.
I guess I have to break the news some time soon. I’m sure she won’t like it but life goes on. I no longer need her to be my sitter, sister, date, best friend, listening ear, encourager, or teacher. There is a new sheriff in town and her name is Life. I know she won’t quit on her own because
she loves the checks. I’d rather pay unemployment in her absence than to pay with hours and days subtracted out of my life.