Every now and then, I don’t want to go through this by myself. I have a real desire to reach and grab hold to something or someone keep me from sinking. Everything seems like a floatation device when you feel like you are sinking. I don’t because it’s selfish. This is no one’s journey but mine. It happens when you no longer know your destination. I am confident that it is greater than anything that I can imagine, but what it looks like or more importantly what will I look and think like, I have no clue. It feels like being in the middle of a dark raging ocean with no oars and no compass. It is then that I remember that something is keeping me afloat and the waves are moving me somewhere. I cry when I feel totally out of control because I recognize that FOR ONCE I HAVE TOTALLY ALLOWED GOD TO HAVE HIS WAY.